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the painful truth

Monday, January 7, 2013

Our son's special need is more involved than we expected.
It's not that we weren't informed.
It's just that, given the information that we had, we hoped for the best,
but "the best" is not what we got.
 
But that's not the painful truth.
 
No.
 
That's not it at all.
 
The painful truth is that if we had known the full extent of Kaikai's special need, we might have overlooked his file. We might have decided that his special need was more than we could handle.
 
And then, we would have missed out on knowing this amazing boy.
 
 
And that, my friends, is extremely painful.
 
Dear ones, there are so many beautiful, amazing children who are in need of families to love them. Children, like our son, who are not perfect, according to the world's standards, but who are precious to our Father, who created them in His image.
 
I absolutely do not think that everyone is called to adopt. But friends, for those of you who are so called, please consider the ones who might not be chosen otherwise.
 
I do believe that it is wisdom to ask ourselves the question of what we can handle, but I also believe that is only one of the questions that we should ask ourselves. The bigger question is "What is God calling me to do?" If it's Jesus who is calling you to step out of your comfort zone, He will give you everything that you need to be the exact parent that child needs.
 
So, even though we didn't necessarily step into this adoption with our eyes wide open, I'm so glad that our Father lead us to THIS particular boy. He truly is an amazing, precious, wonderful child!
 
And that, my friends, is what turns the painful truth (our own limitations and expectations) into something beautiful.
 
Thank you, Jesus, for always being beautiful.

12 comments:

Aus said...

And that, my friend, is the heart of adoption! Beautiful words!!

hugs - aus and co.

Peter and Nancy said...

We are on a similar journey -- wondering how severe our daughter's needs are, and knowing that we are her family no matter what. Already our hearts are changed because of her, and we are entering a new kind of trusting in Him. He is so good to us.
Nancy

Nikki said...

So very true my friend...it's amazing how God works!

Kristen said...

OK, this made me cry. You are so right Sarah, so right. It's so easy to forget that it is GOD who is ultimately in control and JESUS will give us all we need. I hate when I forget that, thank you for reminding me. I'm so happy for you and sweet KaiKai!! :)

Shonni said...

Amen!!!!

Andrew and Heather Robinson said...

I'm so encouraged by your post. Thank you.

Lorisa said...

Sarah, You're words are true and painful. I feel that way about our ShanShan's struggles (learning disabilities and blood disorder) that had we known we probably would have said "no." Here's what I think God did: I think he was protecting us-especially me- from knowing and worrying about what the future might hold. AND of course, I think he was protecting her from a hard and maybe even shortened life in China had she not been adopted! I know now that God knew she was our daughter and that her life and struggles would be another "walk of faith" for me! SO in the long run, I'm glad we didn't know then what we know now! Occasionally ignorance really is bliss! (Hope that made you laugh!)

Jessica said...

Sarah, this is beautiful and just another reminder for me that HIS plans and my plans are not always the same. BUT, I rest in the fact that HE knows best.

I have enjoyed seeing the pictures of your family expanding with numbers, but most importantly with LOVE, this week!

Mummy J said...

Sara, As I was reading your post, I was so nervous, worried... Your words on special needs adoption is so beautiful... I tried writing about our journey to special needs adoption in my blog post, but your words sound wayyy better than mine. With your permission, may I share these words on my blog as well? (with credit to you of course). Prospective parents really do need to hear this and understand this. So So Beautiful.

Colista said...

So thankful you are his daddy and mommy, and that God allowed you to adopt him without knowing *everything*.
I love how he makes all of us individually beautiful.
Thanks for sharing...very touching.

Sally-Girl! said...

Oh, we would not have Bryson if we China had given the full and correct diagnosis and that pains my heart like one could not believe. I shudder when I think of the truth.... the truth that if I had been been in control his adoption perhaps we would not have this sweet blessing in our lives! I can so relate to this post!!! Love how our God changes our hearts!!!

Waitingfaithfully said...

Friend,

I agree with all of the sweet words everyone has shared, but I just need to say that I LOVE you! I love your transparency, I love your heart, I love the way that the Lord uses your honesty and humility to minister to others, and I LOVE that Kaikai is your son, forever--And I love that you KNOW that the Lord will give you all that you need, to be Kaikai's mama.

Phil 4:19-20 "And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus. To our God and Father be glory for ever and ever. Amen."

He is faithful!

Love,

Tina

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