finding the balance...?

Sometimes I get tired of that phrase...

finding the balance

Sometimes I want to give my life away so completely

that I burn out for Him.

Sometimes I get weary of wondering

whether this ministry

or that sort of giving

will tax our family too much.

Sometimes I want to give it all...every single breath.

And I want my family to give every single breath.

Sometimes I want to stop considering whether or not we can

handle more children.

I want to adopt twenty-five children.

Twenty-five

beautiful, precious, messy, loud children

and

I want to move to India

or Africa

or Haiti
and
give everything we own away.

And the thing is...

God does ask me to give it all.

He asks me to give every single bit.

He doesn't ask me to find the balance.

He tells me to give my life away.

But, He also tells me that I am human.

I am not God.

I cannot do everything.

And to think that I can is

quite frankly

ridiculous. 

So, instead of asking how I can find the balance in my life,

I am asking how I can give my life away

completely

as a human being

who is finite

and who lives in this place

right here

right now.

(Anyone care to join me in losing our balance?)